Knowing when to say when...

I have always loved the fashion do's and don'ts in Glamor magazine. Granted, Lady Gaga seems to have used the don'ts to fuel her career, but most of us can't pull off meat dresses or pink vinyl hot pants.

Or chaps.

Motorcycle culture has always fascinated me. James Dean, Marlon Brandon, Elvis. There is something about a black leather motorcycle jacket that transcends trends. They're like a LBD or a Channel suit. You can dress them up or dress them down. Motorcycle leathers seem to get better with age and use.

Well sort of.

I have to admit I'm more of a sports bike kinda gal. Fast boys, not fat boys. Not Gold Wing, but Ducati. Sheesh, my one dog is even named after Valentino Rossi. I like my leathers armored, not dripping Swarovski crystals.

Back to chaps and my Saturday morning shudder. Saturday mornings are reserved for running errands - the bank, drug store, farmer's market. In the epicenter of all these stops is my local Harley Davidson dealer. Lucky me, they were having their open house. People in their 40s, 50s, 60s and 70s all living out their Easy Rider dream.

Would that they had all stayed at the Harley dealer. But no, they wandered into my flight path.

Spotted at my local Walgreens. Two older (like late 60s, early 70s older) folks. A man and woman. Both in brand spanking new motorcycle leathers. His were simpler, more basic. Black leather jacket, matching plain leather chaps, skinny old man butt and slight beer belly. HD baseball cap to cover his bald spot. Her...OMG, her get-up! I could smell how new her jacket was! Indian beaded design on the back, fringe, metal studs. And her flat butt in expensive-looking bedazzled jeans, fashion studded chaps, matching handbag, high heeled ankle boots. Over processed blond hair, tinted glasses with HD logos on the temples.

And their bike? Who knows. I spotted them leaving the Walgreens in their Buick Enclave crossover. I guess you really need those chaps on your heated leather seats.

Know when to say when. Botox if you have to, a little nip and tuck if you dare. But please leave the costumes for Halloween.

And the biker gear to bikers.